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02 February 2007 @ 11:06 am
Season 1 scenes Rewritten for Season 10  
Okay, so a while back I was thinking (maybe a little too much) about Season 10 and some of the things that bug me about it, and how much I miss the early days.  I began to wonder what some of the episodes from S1 would be like if they took place in S10.  Here are two such scenes from two different episodes.  No pairings here, except for a jab at Vaniel... and, um, as far as language goes, consider them PG I guess.

Scene #1. From Broca Divide:

Cam is roughed up from Sam having attacked him for some reason. In the heat of the moment he believes she has tried to seduce him.

Daniel struts into the room.

Daniel: Hey, Mitchell. Vala and I went online to look for something on Australopithecus, although Vala found something on Australia instead and said she'd like to go there for our honeymoon, so, ah... anyway we.... (suddenly notices Cam has rip in his shirt) ... Huh, look at that, would ya? How did that happen?

Cam: Oh, I got into a little wrestling match with Sam.

Daniel: Who? Oh... yeah, her. Why?

Cam: I don't know. She was like a crazy woman, all over me like a pat of butter on a piping hot slice of my granny's cornbread.

Daniel: What, did she start a fight with you like Johnson did with...ah... you know, the big, dark guy... um...... (snaps finger) Oh yeah, Teal'c?

Cam: No, actually, I think she tried to seduce me.

Daniel: .... Oh. Huh. Imagine that.

Cam: Eh, it wasn't anything. I worried about her at first, but I guess it's that stupid old virus thing.

Daniel: (shrugs) Well... yeah guess it could be. Meh, she's all right then. Okay, guess I'll be going off now and getting back to Vala -

Cam: (suddenly) Why?

Daniel: What do you mean, why? Because she's my better half...

Cam: (grabbing Daniel by his BDU jacket) What does THAT mean?

Daniel: It means she's my better half and I love her. Without her I'd shrivel like a raisin. Get it, new guy? Heh heh. Now let go of the threads, sissy boy.

Cam: She's not yours to love.

Daniel: The hell she isn't!! (punches Cam and knocks him over, then proceeds to kick him before Walter and another SF pull him off of an injured Cam.)

Daniel then grabs a P-90 from his holster and turns it on Walter and the SF.

Daniel: (screaming) GET AWAY FROM ME!! NO ONE TOUCHES ACTION!JACKSON!!!

Walter and the SF whimper and scurry from the room. Daniel looks down at the still injured Cam and snorts haughtily before strutting out of the room.

Female technician: (helping him up) You okay?

Cam: Uh... no... ...... oh, right alien virus is ravaging through my innards, so um... wanna go check out the cornfields, honey?

(and here we dissolve to... somewhere else. Maybe Daniel and Vala at the travel agency or something like that...)


Scene 2: Singularity

Sam emerges from VIP room after having checked on Cassie. She begins to head down the corridor when Daniel bumps into her.

Daniel: Ow... um... oh, the girl is in there isn't she?

Sam: (a bit insulted) Yes, “the girl” is in there.

Daniel: Oh okay, see I didn't know because I was just having a grand old time with Vala and totally lost track of the time. So .... um....... yeah, how is she then?

Sam: (frowns) She's FINE. Sleeping.

Daniel: Uh huh. Well I would offer to sit with her for a couple of hours or something, but Vala demands all my time, ya know. It gets that way when you're engaged.

Sam: Yeah, I'm sure. Anyway I don't need your pathetic offer, I'm okay.

Daniel: All right then, well I'm headed back to Vala's quarters. Shame I guess you have to do this alone but when you have such a fixation to a child I guess that's what happens, eh?

Sam: (glares in silence) Your attitude stinks. (slaps Daniel in face)

Daniel: Ow...

Sam walks briskly away. Daniel stands there, just a tad surprised before wiping a bead of sweat off his face, sniffing haughtily in the air and going back to his fiancée.

On this, we fade out.

Okay so maybe I went a little too far in these. But, given the disappointing stuff tptb have been cranking out this season (IMHO anyway), I wouldn't put it past them to do something like this.

 
 
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Christine (aka) Pineapple >^..^<: DanSamchris4short on February 2nd, 2007 07:12 pm (UTC)
How about I'm just cracking up!!! Awww... so sad, and at some point, sadly true, i'm sure to the PTB... you know, the ivory tower guys who are too big for their britches and forgot to consult the SG-Bible on how friends act...
jessm78: grow apartjessm78 on February 6th, 2007 07:59 pm (UTC)
lol... thanks... yeah it is a real shame.. I was watching PDL's Director's Series thing for Prototype and he said that the talking is boring, they have to have explosions and gunfights and sexy alien chicks (not exact quote but pretty darn close). So yeah with that attitude I guess it's to be expected *roll eyes*