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20 November 2006 @ 10:49 pm
I hate PMS...  
... I really hate it. There is a history of it in my family...my mom used to have it so I guess it's only natural that I'd have it too. Almost this whole weekend I've had these mood swings, and they're really bad today. This morning I was depressed, almost in tears, then I felt better as the day went on. Now I'm a blubbering mess. Things are bothering me more than they normally would and I'm a lot more sensitive.

That whole to-do I posted about in the previous entry, about MS "dissing" the S/D ship... it turns out that he doesn't want Daniel paired with anyone, so he was pretty much "dissing" all the ships. Someone at the Daniel/MS thread at GW told me that. People were understanding and nice and we ended the discussion. I felt better.

This evening someone decided to resurrect the discussion and says to me that I really gotta let a few things slide, that there is a S/D shipper thread for this type of discussion so could I please leave it in there. She says that this thread is about DANIEL and MICHAEL sometimes with others, mostly without.

I saw that post and my mood went totally south. First of all, I thought it was sort of related because they were talking about MS at the con. I posted what I thought he said. So what if it's about my ship? People post stuff about D/V ship there from time to time, as well as Jack/Daniel. They don't get told to leave that stuff in their respective threads. I did reply to this person, my fingers going a mile a minute on the keyboard and trying to retain my composure. I probably sounded like an idiot in what I said, but basically said that it sounds as if she hates me and I don't really feel welcome there anymore, that maybe I should leave.

Honestly, maybe it is me. Maybe I am an idiot for posting such things over there. Maybe I should cool down and not be so emotional, but it's so hard to do that at the moment. I am literally in tears right now, because I am so darned sensitive at this time and I hate thinking that someone hates me and thinks there's something wrong with me.

I should really end this and go to bed, but I can't sleep now. I'd hate to leave that thread because I met some nice people there and I'd miss them, but I'd hate to go there knowing that there will be someone who hates me and would probably lash out at me or give me tons of neg rep for even posting something totally benign like a picture of Daniel/Michael.

Thanks for listening to my rambling mess here... I wish these mood swings would ease up soon... gee I really hate PMS...
Tags: ,
Current Location: home
Current Mood: sadsad
Christine (aka) Pineapple >^..^<chris4short on November 21st, 2006 04:59 pm (UTC)
*hugs* oh sweetie!! Spank that PMS and huddle in the corner with Daniel. If Sam comes, give her the glare, I'm sure she will understand completely!!

Umm I did post another S/D quick fic yesterday... um not a total upbeat one, but it ends well. Also I tink I have ones of stuff done so I am going to play for the afternoon - fic style. I'll see if I can't make you smile... tea? cookies? hug danny any harder and you may pop.. oh here is another funny con/MS thing - someone gave him a Stewie Bobblehead... and he said that Thor will be coming back - and that thor now sounds strangely like Stewie.... :-D
jessm78: surprisedjessm78 on November 21st, 2006 05:18 pm (UTC)
Thanks :) I'm feeling better now - that Daniel really works wonders! Heehee... Sam hasn't come yet but he's starting to get nervous...thinks she'll notice how long he's been gone!

Went over and read and reviewed your fic... it does end well, nice hopeful note. :) Mmm some tea would be nice... LOL MS is a riot. I'm trying to picture Thor sounding like Stewie now... lol!

Thanks for the laughs and cheering up! :) *HUGS*
Christine (aka) Pineapple >^..^<chris4short on November 21st, 2006 05:23 pm (UTC)
Whoo hoo!!! mission accomplished!!! Aw no prob. I was so excited when he said Thor will be back.. and now with a stewie twang to it... errr... interesting.

"Those Earthings have high quality Tee-Vee. I must imulate it." - Thor
TB: daniel teddy-icon_ascensionteddibear on November 21st, 2006 07:21 pm (UTC)
*hugs* I haven't hit that thread yet but really screw em. And have you noticed anything about any of the questions I asked him? Cuz I'm really waiting for someone to go off on the fic one.

I didn't like that he dissed the ship either. But then again I didn't like that he dissed fic either since that's what is responsible for me becoming a fan in the first place. That's why I was trying to get him to understand where I was coming from and then tell him about my experience at the autographing. But since we were getting pushed through so fast, well didn't really have much chance so now I just look like an idiot.

*hugs* sadly not everyone is gonna get everything. That's a reason I haven't gone into forums again because it's hard to defend your choices when everyone starts ganging up on you.

Take a breath, virtually hug the Monkey and get some chocolate. If it helps any, I think you rock. *smooch*

jessm78: Politicsjessm78 on November 21st, 2006 09:15 pm (UTC)
Thanks for the hugs Gwen :) I feel a lot better. You're right - screw 'em. I'm going to take a breather from that place. The Burbank Con thread itself is okay - no one arguing and just people sharing their experiences and having one or two laughs. Most of all I love the pics they've been posting! It's the Daniel/MS Thunk thread where they've been getting up in arms. They're really a great bunch of people ("hussies") - I was surprised they got so reactionary. But then again seems like some of the "old guard" act all high and mighty once in a while. I'm cutting back my time there and I'll only visit the threads that are friendly (the S/D Ship thread is one of them).

I don't blame you. I thought he said some time ago that he's read Jack/Daniel fic and found it "interesting" or "scary" or something like that. I thought he was joking a little but I'm not sure. He probably shouldn't have said anything, or something like "fic may not be my personal cup of tea, but it's amazing what fans can come up with" or "it's nice that the show inspires people." No one's said anything about the fic question yet, as far as I've seen. They've just posted little tidbits in the con thread. I think one person wrote up a whole report, but she didn't post the link anywhere and it's Invitation Only in her LJ. *shrugs*

Thanks for the little pep talk. :D I'm feeling a lot better. *hugs back*
TB: daniel slash writer-photoshoprangerteddibear on November 21st, 2006 09:56 pm (UTC)
You're very welcome :) And that's a great idea. I have been fretting over my actions towards MS ever since the photog pointed out I coulda irritated him and it's like I just really need to let it go. I wasn't THAT bad and I'm sure he's encountered worse than me. At least I hope. Heh.

That definitely woulda been a better answer. I'll chalk it up to him being exhausted from his crazy schedule. He's really outta his mind booking all this stuff but heh, more power to him and it got him there :)

Yeah that thread looked alright. I'm actually checking out the MS/Thunk thread right now. Wanna see if anything has been mentioned. Someone did mention two of my questions but nothing derogatory was said about me or the manner I asked them. So that's good. Next year I probably won't be as nuts. I mean when I asked Jason and Torri their questions I was pretty calm and such. Same with Cliff and Colin. So really it was Michael himself and then Cliff sitting me on his lap. LOL.

You're very welcome. I know how much mood swings can really suck (I have extreme ones myself which I HATE) and it's so easy to second guess yourself when you're feeling like utter crap. So I'm glad you're feeling better :)

*hugs* Take care of yourself :) Oh I saw your drawing they had signed. It was gorgeous! You're really talented :)
jessm78: Cor Aijessm78 on November 21st, 2006 10:55 pm (UTC)
Oh there are definitely worse. Once at a con in the UK (I think) some girl grabbed his a$$ - not joking. People have asked him pretty outrageous questions in the past. I saw him at the NJ con in 2004 and some bratty kid was bugging him, following him and Chris Judge around, stalking them... it's amazing what they have to put up with.

I saw Teryl Rothery at the NJ con a couple of weeks back. I was in line for autographs and some girl before me was chatting with her while she was getting her Women of Science calendars signed. I thought it was my turn, but the girl came back and talked to her again. I had started to talk (I was going to give her a "Janet tribute" story one of my friends wrote) when Teryl interrupted me and said, "oh, just a minute, okay? She's a friend" and gestured to the girl. I felt so stupid thinking I shoulda waited my turn and I was almost beating myself up over it. But I started to realize it was an honest mistake - no sense in dwelling over it.

I'm not sure if I want to visit the Daniel/MS thread tonight. I made one last post there and I'm almost afraid of what they're saying in reply... don't know if I want to expose myself to more abuse. I might check it out tomorrow morning, but maybe only as a guest. I'm glad that no one said anything derogatory about your questions. :) People are usually pretty reasonable on there.

Yeah, and it gets annoying because I don't know when it's going to strike (well - yeah I sorta know, but it's not always that bad). Thanks again. :)

*hugs back* Same to you! And thanks for the compliments, I'm glad you liked my drawing. :) I was going to make another for him, one that said "thanks for ten seasons of Daniel" and a few sketches of him. I started it but didn't get to finish after I heard he cancelled the NJ con. Someone told me I should finish it anyway... I guess I will at some point.

Oh btw... I'm giggling like crazy over your avatar here...the one that says Daniel writes slash stories in his spare time... that's great!! :D
TB: d/c mock-lorencyteddibear on November 21st, 2006 11:11 pm (UTC)
Hee, isn't that icon great? photoshopranger made it :)

Ok so I was crazy and read through the forum (from like last Thurs till now) to see what was going on. First off, there's a shitload of delicious pics there. Second, I think because of your mood swings you may have taken what they said a little harsher than was intended (I have no idea about the PMs but from the forum itself, it didn't seem TOO bad) and I have had that same issue myself. Third, so far nothing else has been mentioned so I think you're ok. I've been checking threads myself and I'm contemplating saying hi. I did ask a lot of questions but I didn't stalk him. Got my stuff signed and such and I went back to my seat shaking and all. I just hope he got my Tigger (I gave him it as a pressie) and all.

PMS can be very very bad as can mood swings and they tend to make us caring ladies oversensitive and do stupid things (I speak from rabid experience). So I think all should be ok. I hope the PMs you were getting weren't too nasty, like I said, I have no access to those but things on the forum look alright. So you should be ok.

Well good, I'm not the craziest one then. Hee. I'll just blame my nuttiness on MS' proximity. Cuz really I had been there to see him and well maybe I went overboard. I'll do a write up later, you can judge for yourself. Or maybe Chris and Nicole can way in. I'm an SG-1 con virgin and when I did FSF and James Marsters, I wasn't AS excited. So who knows?

I say do the pics anyways. I'd love to see em :)

And I hope I didn't upset you with what I said. So not my intention, just my honest observation. Because I have had the very same problem. I am my own worst critic after all.

*hugs* we'll have to chat more when I get home. I friended you btw. Take care of yourself and hang in there!

*smooch* :) Here's an icon you may like :) Hopefully it will crack you up :)
jessm78: thinkingjessm78 on November 22nd, 2006 12:45 am (UTC)
Yep - *very* cool. :D

They do post some great pics there - they even have a schedule that people usually stick to, though some just post random pics. It's all good. Well, that's good to know. Yeah, it probably did come off as harsher than it normally would have. Unfortunately I also have this problem of being quite sensitive, so I guess it bothers me even more when I have the mood swings. *blushes* I mean, even now I think I went a little overboard with the "hope no one hates me" stuff. The ones who PM'd me were a bit worse though - with the exaggeration and the "stop it now!!!" stuff. But I did get a few others who were nice and supportive, which I was glad for.

That's exactly it. I was pretty oversensitive. Hopefully they understand. I'll take a peek over there in the morning. I'm literally falling asleep here (not from being bored but I've been up since 6 am this morning...bleh).

I'd definitely be interested in seeing a write-up. I could hardly talk when I first met him. I think the only words I said were "Hi," "Good" and "Thank you"... lol I can elaborate if you want. ;)

Thanks! I'm glad I didn't scrap it then. I should have some time during the long weekend to work on it more.

Nope, you didn't upset me. I'm okay with what you said because I agree...although I'm embarrassed I know how I took it because it's happened quite a bit in the past. My own worst critic - that does describe me.

Cool, I friended you too. :) I'm heading for bed now - almost 11 pm. Hope to talk to you tomorrow! *hugs*

Heehee... oh that's a good one! *thumbs up*